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Knotts Scary Farm
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Knotts Scary Farm will always have a special place in my heart. It’s the original Halloween Haunt and as a teen, it was my dad’s and my special outing.
We both loved scary movies and got a thrill and a chuckle from being scared unexpectedly.
Over the years, I’ve had a love-hate relationship with the Haunt due to the ridiculously long lines for each maze and ride. One year in particular when I brought a large group to attend the event, the wait times were so egregious that we could only partake in 3 rides/mazes during the course of the evening which prompted a very detailed scathing complaint letter to be sent to Knotts Customer Relations, resulting in the full refund of all tickets purchased. Traumatized, it took an entire decade for me to return to the Haunt.
Last year was the first year we bought a Fright Pass and though at times, we still had a bit of a wait, it was not nearly as much as the regular lines.
This year, we opted for the entire package which included parking, the boo-fet, Fright Pass and admission. When we first arrived, we asked one of the employees where to park if we had the all-inclusive package. He sadly didn’t know. Strike One. We drove to the Preferred Parking Lot and the attendant said our prepaid parking lot was next to the hotel lot. My husband offered to pay the difference between what we already paid and their $35 fee. She said it would be $35 regardless. I sped off not wanting to waste any more time with somebody who wasn’t going to even attempt to be helpful. Strike Two.
In hindsight, going forward, for future visits, we will opt for the Preferred Lot since come to find out, the regular lot typically has a long line to enter, and it ate away precious time we could have spent at dinner.
Fortunately, entering the lot by way of the all-you-can-eat boo-fet was fairly seamless. Heading towards the entrance of the park, just past Mrs. Knotts Fried Chicken Restaurant was a sign pointing left towards the boo-fet.
At the check-in area, women’s purses were searched, we were given a wristband for the Fright Pass, and then we were directed towards the scary ghoul for a photo shoot memorializing our evening which was an added perk to the cost of the boo-fet.
We headed to Spurs Chop House for our 6 p.m. reservation, albeit 20 minutes late. There was a short wait during which we were given large sip cups as free refillable beverages came with the boo-fet. Once seated, we went to town.
I had been saving my fried chicken craving for the dinner but also found an addictive cheesy mashed potato. There were plenty of options so we tasted a bit of everything as we went along until we couldn’t eat anything more.
A bit after 7, we waddled our way into the park and got on our first ride, GhostRider. Our wait time was 15 minutes while the regular wait was 2 hours. Not that we had any doubt about the splurge for the Fright Pass but at that rate, conceivably one could only go on 2-3 rides/mazes for the evening which was money and time not well spent.
After that ride, we went through 4 mazes, Wax Works, The Depths, Paranormal Inc. and Dark Entities, each averaging between a 5-10 minute wait. Then we headed back on GhostRider which had a longer wait of 30 minutes the second time.
We stood in line for our fifth maze, Special Ops Infected, where we met a couple who were new parents to a three month old. It was their first outing without their baby. We each talked about our travels around the world, our learnings and takeaways and how important it was to seek and learn from other people and cultures different from your own as the xenophobia that has become rampant in all aspects of politics and religion was the crux of what has been destroying our civilization. Our conversation came to a close as we got to the front of the line and were handed laser rifles to eliminate the zombies that were going to try to kill us inside the maze. It seemed like a fitting way to close the loop on our chat.
After we survived the zombies, we finally ventured outside of Ghost Town and headed to the Boardwalk area. The first ride my husband saw was HangTime which went straight up vertically and straight down before looping every which way at an accelerated speed. I was beyond petrified and couldn’t bare to look at the ride as we stood in line. It took about 20 minutes before we made our way to the front, and we ended up chatting with a group of couples in their 20s visiting from Arizona. One of the young women had somehow talked herself out of going on the ride by the time our turn came. I convinced her to sit with me/us on the ride and promised we would get through it together, suggesting that we keep our eyes closed for the duration of the ride to assuage our fears. Despite all our apprehensions, we made it back, strengthened and invigorated from facing and conquering our fears. After exchanging a high five and giving each other a celebratory hug, we parted ways.
That gave us ammunition to head to the next ride, Xcelerator. Sadly, its name was the antonym of the speed upon which people would be able to enjoy the 20 second ride. We saw people leaving during the 45-60 minutes we waited in the Fright Lane. It dawned on us that only one car was working and the crew was extraordinarily slow in getting people on and off the ride. We eventually gave up our place in line as it was already midnight and we still had a 45 minute drive home. Strike Three.
As we exited the line that barely moved, we passed by a maze, Shadowlands. Not wanting the last memory of the Haunt to be of irritation and disappointment, I convinced my husband to jump in the very short line and surprisingly, it was one of our favorite mazes due to its Japanese theme. Having gone on a 10 day vacation to Japan a year prior, we had a deeper understanding and appreciation for the Japanese design aesthetics as well as the samurai lifestyle and discipline. Obviously, it took the intrinsic Asian vibe and twisted it into a suspenseful, dark and heart-stopping experience as only the creatives at Knotts can do.
In a span of five hours, we walked through six mazes and went on three rides and despite a few hiccups, we considered our visit to the park a success and well worth the upgrade for a Fright Pass. I initially felt we had missed out on more rides, having wasted precious time in line at Xcelerator but truth be told, we were there specifically for the Scary Farm.
We have visited other parks for the Halloween experience but choose Knotts as the King of all Haunts. It’s the original, has decades of experience with the perfect setting for a haunted and ghoulish evening. The all-inclusive package is reasonably priced compared to its competitors and Knotts’ lot is a manageable size for the activities. Most importantly, the visitors to this specific park fit the mold of those who seek an authentic haunting, chilling and fun experience and fully understand, respect and appreciate the production value of the event, abiding by the unspoken rules of decorum, making Knotts the only Halloween Haunt for us.
Knotts Halloween Haunt
8039 Beach Boulevard
Buena Park, CA 90620
https://www.knotts.com/play/scary-farm
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